10 Things you’ll never hear the opposite sex say

October 1, 2011 0

No.	Women	Men
10	Could our relationship be more Physical? I’m tired of just being friends.	I think Barry Manilow is one cool motherfucker.
9	Go ahead and leave the seat up, it’s easier for me to douche that way.	While I’m up, can I get you a beer?
8	I think hairy butts are really sexy.	I think hairy butts are really sexy.
7	Hey, get a whiff of that one.	Her tits are just too big.
6	Please don’t throw that old T-shirt away, the holes in the armpit are just too cute.	Sometimes I just want to be held.
5	This diamond is way too big.	That chick on Murder, She Wrote gives me a woody.
4	I won’t even put my lips on that things unless I get to swallow	Sure, I’d love to wear a condom.
3	Wow, it really is 12 inches!	We haven’t been to the mall for ages, let’s go shopping and I can hold your purse.
2	Does this make my butt look too small?	Fuck Monday Night Football, let’s watch Murphy Brown.
1	I’m wrong, you must be right again.	I think we are lost, we better pull over and ask for directions